Cowboy's Guide to Life
* Your fences need to be horse high, pig tight, and bull strong.

* Life is not about how fast you run, or how high you climb, but how well you bounce.

* Keep skunks and bankers and lawyers at a distance.

* Life is simpler when you plow around the stump.

* A bumble bee is considerably faster than a John Deere tractor.

* Words that soak into your ears are whispered - not yelled.

* Meanness doesn't just happen overnight.

* Forgive your enemies. It messes up their heads.

* Don't sell your mule to buy a plow.

* Do not corner something that you know is meaner than you.

* It doesn't take a very big person to carry a grudge.

* You can NOT unsay a cruel word........

* Every path has a few puddles.

* When you wallow with pigs, expect to get dirty.

* The best sermons are lived, not preached.

* Most of the stuff people worry about isn't ever going to happen anyway.....

* Don't squat down with your spurs on.

* Don't judge people by their relatives.

* Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer.

* Live a good and honorable life, then when you're old you will enjoy it a second time.

* Don't interfere with something that isn't bothering you. In other words, mind your own
business.

* Timing has a lot to do with the outcome of a rain dance.

* It's better to be a has-been than a never-was.

* The easiest way to eat crow is while it's still warm. The colder it gets, the harder it is to
swallow.

* If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop digging.

* If it doesn't seem worth the effort, it probably isn't!

* It doesn't take a genius to spot a goat in a flock of sheep.

* The biggest troublemaker you'll probably ever have to deal with is the face in the mirror every
morning.

* If you get to thinking you're a person of some influence, try ordering somebody else's dog
around.

* Don't worry about biting off more than you can chew; your mouth is probably a whole lot bigger
than you think.

* Only cows know why they stampede.

* Always drink upstream from the herd.

* If you're riding ahead of the herd, take a look back every now and then to make sure it's still
with you.

* Good judgment comes from experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.

* Letting the cat out of the bag is a whole lot easier than putting it back.

* You can't tell how good a man or a watermelon is 'till they get thumped'.

* Never, Never - miss a good opportunity to shut up.

category: cultural  date entered: 2006-12-21