Dilbert's Rules of Order
1. Accept that some days you are the pigeon and some days the statue.

2. Needing someone is like needing a parachute. If he isn't there the first time chances are
you won't be needing him again.

3. Everybody is somebody else's weirdo.

4. Never argue with an idiot. They drag you down to their level, then beat you with experience.

5. A pat on the back is only a few centimeters from a kick in the butt.

6. Don't be irreplaceable -- if you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.

7. After any salary raise, you will have less money at the end of the month than you did before.

8. The more crap you put up with, the more crap you are going to get.

9. You can go anywhere you want if you look serious and carry a clipboard.

10. Eat one live toad the first thing in the morning and nothing worse will happen to you the
rest of the day.

11. If it wasn't for the last minute, nothing would get done.

13. When you don't know what to do, walk fast and look worried.

14. Following the rules will not get the job done.

15. When confronted by a difficult problem, you can solve it more easily by reducing it to the
question, " How would the Lone Ranger handle this?"


category: general  date entered: 2006-03-09