Creative Writing Assignment
Rebecca and Gary
English 44A
Creative Writing
Prof Miller

In-class Assignment for Wednesday

Today we will experiment with a new form called the tandem story. The process is simple. Each
person will pair off with the person sitting to his or her immediate right. One of you will then
write the first paragraph of a short story. The partner will read the first paragraph and then
add another paragraph to the story. The first person will then add a third paragraph, and so on
back and forth. Remember to reread what has been written each time in order to keep the story
coherent. The story is over when both agree a conclusion has been reached.

* * * * * *

At first, Laurie couldn't decide which kind of tea she wanted. The camomile, which used to be her
favorite for lazy evenings at home, now reminded her too much of Carl, who once said, in happier
times, that he liked camomile. But she felt she must now, at all costs, keep her mind off Carl.
His possessiveness was suffocating, and if she thought about him too much her asthma started
acting up again. So camomile was out of the question.

Meanwhile, Captain Carl Harris, leader of the attack squadron now in orbit over Skylon 4, had more
important things to think about than the neuroses of an air-headed bimbo named Laurie with whom
he had spent one boring evening over a year ago. "Harris to Geostation 17," he said into his transgalactic
communicator. "Polar orbit established. No sign of resistance so far..." But before he could sign off a
bluish particle beam flashed out of nowhere and blasted a hole through his ship's cargo bay. The jolt
from the direct hit sent him flying out of his seat and across the cockpit.

He bumped his head and died almost immediately, but not before he felt one last pang of regret for
psychically brutalizing the one woman who had ever had feelings for him. Soon afterwards, Earth
stopped its pointless hostilities towards the peaceful farmers of Skylon 4. "Congress Passes Law
Permanently Abolishing War and Space Travel," Laurie read in her newspaper one morning. The
news simultaneously excited her and bored her. She stared out the window, dreaming of her youth ?
when the days had passed unhurriedly and carefree, with no newspapers to read, no television to
distract her from her sense of innocent wonder at all the beautiful things around her. "Why must one
lose one's innocence to become a woman?" she pondered wistfully.

Little did she know, but she has less than 10 seconds to live. Thousands of miles above the city,
the Anu'udrian mothership launched the first of its lithium fusion missiles. The dim-witted wimpy
peaceniks who pushed the Unilateral Aerospace Disarmament Treaty through Congress had left Earth
a defenseless target for the hostile alien empires who were determined to destroy the human race.
Within two hours after the passage of the treaty the Anu'udrian ships were on course for Earth,
carrying enough firepower to pulverize the entire planet. With no one to stop them they swiftly
initiated their diabolical plan. The lithium fusion missile entered the atmosphere unimpeded. The
President, in his top-secret mobile submarine headquarters on the ocean floor off the coast of
Guam, felt the inconceivably massive explosion which vaporized Laurie and 85 million other
Americans. The President slammed his fist on the conference table. "We can't allow this! I'm
going to veto that treaty! Let's blow 'em out of the sky!"

This is absurd. I refuse to continue this mockery of literature. My writing partner is a violent,
chauvinistic, semi-literate adolescent.

Yeah? Well, you're a self-centered tedious neurotic whose attempts at writing are the literary
equivalent of Valium.

You total [censored].

Stupid [censored].

category: men and women  date entered: 2006-09-18